Shaniah is turning three in little under a month and I’ve been trying to think of a way to mark this special milestone on my blog, then it hit me, why don’t I share her pretty humorous birth story? So here goes…
It was a pretty ordinary Wednesday, I was 5 days overdue and quite frankly fed up, I couldn’t remember the last time I saw my feet and don’t get me started on my lady region (I didn’t want to know what state that was in). 2014 was the year of the Loom Band craze, and my brother was adamant he wanted a crocodile but didn’t know where to start so we were making that before it was time to take him to school.
It was 8:30am so time to take Ashley to school this was one walk I was definitely going to go on I wanted my baby out! I tried eating a curry, eating pineapple and quite frankly this had to work. We dropped Ashley off at school then popped into Co-op to get something for dinner. I absolutely love spaghetti Bolognese so that was on the cards, we got down the crisps isle when a dull pain took me by surprise, I didn’t think nothing of it as I had been experiencing Braxton hicks on and off for a while now so I carried on with the shop then made my way home. we dropped my Nan off back at hers then I went back to tackle that crocodile that Ashley had longed for. The pains were still there in fact they were coming faster now and it was hard to concentrate. Mum called the hospital for advice but they too suspected it to be Braxton hicks so told me to go have a bath and that should ease it. There I was having a bath hoping it would pass when in reality it was getting worse I shouted down for mum as at that moment I was freaking out. She called the hospital again and that was when they ordered me to come in so at just gone one we jumped in the car and went to get Nan as both my Mother and Nan were going to be my birthing partners. The journey there saw the pains getting closer.
We got into the ward and they started to monitor me, I wasn’t in active labour yet but I wasn’t far off. I was in the most horrible pain but anyone who know’s me will know that I have a very low pain threshold and my periods see me throwing up and screaming out in pain. As I was suffering with the pain they decided to give me gas and air which Oh my word is a god send! A few puffs on that and I was in heaven, A few hours later they gave me Pethidine, now unbeknownst to us, Pethidine shouldn’t be given to people with epilepsy as it reacts and can cause seizures, it was written in my notes but we didn’t know and the people looking after me clearly didn’t either. About 30 minutes later I was starting to hallucinate, there was suddenly a load of animals in the room with me, In fact there was a donkey sat in the bed beside me. When I went to the toilet I was adamant that I was being followed by a Zebra and upon getting back into bed I was freaked out by an evil duck in the window. When they came in to check how dilated I was I screamed “Ah he’s stabbed me in my arse!” The woman was not amused. I was starting to progress so they were getting ready to take me down thats when I said “no I cant go yet boris Johnson my husband is on his way” Yep in all the commotion I believed that I was married to good old Bo-Jo!
It was about 4 something in the afternoon and I was finally ready to go push my baby out, they wheeled me down to the delivery suite and I shouted I need to push, The midwives were telling me it’s all in my head there’s no way I needed to push yet my waters haven’t gone, but before they could finish their sentence to their horror I pushed. She then realised that I was telling the truth so popped my waters and we carried on, I was led sideways on the bed instead of the usual way which made everything that much harder for those helping me out, with every push I pooped a little then started swearing and apologizing at the embarrassment but little under 5 hours later at 10.16pm Shaniah was born weighing 7lb2oz. My vagina was butchered but my word she was so worth it whilst they did everything they needed to do with her one poor woman had to stitch my battered vagina back up.
When everything was done I was offered some toast and tea that was when my Nan told me that both Shaniah and I were born 5 days late, On a Wednesday and weighing 7lb2oz. How crazy is that?